The Most Powerful Force on Earth

Then Peter approaching asked Him, “Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times? Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times, but seventy times seven.” (Mt 18:21-22)

Some years ago, I had a falling out with someone who had once been a close friend. We had worked together for months on a number of projects, and had done some very good work together. Unfortunately, we had some serious differences of opinion on some key points that we could never resolve. I tried to do what I could to mend fences, but nothing seemed to work, and we ended up going our separate ways.

For months, I agonized over that situation. As long as my friend refused to even talk to me, much less forgive me, I felt trapped in the circumstances. I asked a priest I knew for some counsel, and he pointed out to me that forgiveness is a much different animal than reconciliation – which is what I really wanted. If both parties are not willing, reconciliation is not possible. But, he point out to me, it was within my power to forgive my friend, even if she didn’t ask for my forgiveness or think she had done anything that warranted forgiveness. And extending forgiveness was not contingent on receiving forgiveness from her.

The Scriptures remind us that we will be forgiven in the measure with which we forgive others. When we say the Lord’s Prayer – and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors (Mt. 6:12) - we had better be serious. There is no caveat for whether or not the other person asks for forgiveness, or whose fault it might be, or anything else. When Jesus prayed from the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Lk.23:34), He didn’t wait for His executioners to ask for forgiveness. As far as we can tell, they never did. It didn’t matter. Jesus forgave them anyway, and we are called to imitate His example.

The priest who counseled me gave me a short mantra prayer to say whenever feelings of anger or hostility toward my friend would well up in me: Jesus, I choose to forgive. Please forgive me. It took weeks of saying that little prayer, but over time I could feel the knots of resentment beginning to soften and unravel as the grace of forgiveness began to work in me.

Like love, forgiveness is not a feeling or emotion, but rather an act of the will, a decision. It is the most powerful force on earth, for when we choose the path of forgiveness, we find in the end that we are the ones who are set free.

Prayer Request:
For those imprisoned in the grip of hurt, anger, and resentment that they just can’t seem to let go.

Prayer:
Jesus, I choose to forgive. Please forgive me. Amen.